My husband snores...Real Loud..(I am too sleep deprived to think of a better title)

So my husband snores and like really snores,…so much so that you wish you could cut your ears to sleep again after you wake up in the middle of the night by mistake.

Then the following thoughts come in…….

1)      Oh God, I need a pin to staple his nose shut.

2)      Thank god I have a husband sleeping next to me at least, it’s better than sleeping alone.

3)      Prepare Excuses in case I don’t sleep for hours together and wake up late cause “ my husband snores” won’t be a good enough excuse right?

4)      I am getting a new bed and shifting him to the other bedroom tomorrow.
5)      No, calm music being played at the loudest volume is not helping. 

"Incomplete, unsuccessful or unhappy" without motherhood. Not Really!

A question was posed to me yesterday, “How many kids?”, I said "None" then came the next question, "So recently married, huh?", I said “No” and then came the look that I guess meant confusion, pity or “What’s she doing with her life”.

Two days ago, there was another question, "So how long have you been married" and I said 6 ..."So how my many kids", I said "None" and I got the same look.

Same question, framed different.      

“Married – Yes - How many kids? – None - Huh!”

                             “Kids – No – How long have you been married? – “>=3” – Huh!”

It doesn't stop here. In an interview a couple of months ago, I was asked, “So how many kids?”; I said “None”, and then came the sagely advice, "Don't you think this is a right time to have one, It’s too late, No?" I replied, “My husband and I certainly don't think so”. Of course I received the offer letter but I just can’t bring myself to work with someone who thinks he has a better plan of motherhood and it's timings of the same than me. I wasn’t prepared for how he would have guided me in my career cause that’s what he should have been concerned about.

Around 5 years ago, same question, same answer, reaction “That’s a bold move”. There was always an opinion.

Kudos to the ladies who manage both! You are really something. But does not having kids diminish my self worth. No matter how many women empowerment videos we watch and how much of the same we forward, we will never get over the fact that women will always be expected to perform certain roles that the society has designated for us.

I will always be the looser who didn't get her timing right!

However these questions don't bug me anymore (because now there have been so many that I am pretty much thick skinned). Not having a kid is my choice but what about the women who choose to and are trying hard to be mothers and can't be one due to some issues; financial issues, health issues etc. These questions to me are just questions that I can brush of, but to some they can be plain insensitive. Actually they are insensitive to me too. (You don’t know my situation, but you see, thick skinned :-)

Can we be less judgmental? When we ask a lady if she has kids and she says No, press the stop button and move on. Keep your advice like biological clock, right timing etc. to yourself and gulp it down with a chill pill. 

P.S. Both genders involved in asking these questions.

I am a dragon breathing fire! Beautiful Mane, I am the lion.

I ran away from home once. I was 10 years old. I carried with me, my school books and my school uniform and wore my birthday dress cause it was my favorite ( yeah, school was always important to me. I thought the nuns of my convent school would adopt me I guess). Walked 1 km away from home, realized my bag was heavy, that I miss mom already and it was not worth the trashing if they did trace me (which I knew my mom was capable of) and returned. Till date that remains the only brave things I did………. 

        .............................Now wait a minute that’s not it.

I am a brave girl and I have many more to add to my list of brave things …

1)      I left home to pursue my education abroad.

2)      I walked out of a bad relationship and rebuilt my life.

3)      I left my well set career in Mumbai to explore a new one in Bengaluru and failed (because I had a

       d*** for a boss and  a D** for a colleague) and then succeeded again.

4)      I hit a guy in train because he messed with my best friend, with no worry of how it would back 

fire.

5)      I questioned my professor when he wouldn’t let me submit my assignment because I was a few hours late and got him to accept it without saying a sorry

6)      I questioned my parents over their choice of spouse for me and didn’t settle.

7)      I married the love of my life and my best friend despite the odds.

8)  Went to the police station and filed an NOC for my friend who was being harassed by a stalker. 

And many more.

Every woman has a heart of a warrior in her and she can accomplish so much with knowing exactly how brave she is. If only every girl knew that.

To quote Guru Beyonce  :-)  I am a dragon breathing fire! Beautiful Mane, I am the lion. 

Back on my feet

It’s been ages since I have not written. Well the thoughts were there but strangely the idea left my brain the moment they came in. Thoughts like would that be a stupid topic to discuss and wouldn’t people think I am stupid, would people think I am trying to be a smart ass…wouldn’t people think..

I hardly have any views on this blog spot, but the fear of people reading and judging me was so strong that I have almost lost the enthusiasm to mention anything once I picked the laptop to write.

How did this happen, when did I become the person who cared so much….

I know that the last one year has not been easy, mostly my fault..going through depression,  people believing that its’ just an act,  met some real pricks who claimed to be my friends, my mind has not stood still..but the most basic harm ..I have not been myself .  I cared too much about what some looser ass without half(make that a quarter) of  my credentials thinks about me. Yeah I said cared …past tense..because post this blog…there are new ones coming…ones I will write without giving a sh** about which douche bags feelings are getting hurt here…or what that douche bag thinks … I don’t care for judgment anymore.

Boy….I am really angry, aint I… I thought douchebag was a single word. J